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Getting Heard

From Routine to Purpose

Is this truly your routine, or is it rooted in a deeper value? Why do you do what you do each day?

It’s easy to fall into routines on autopilot. Over time, we continue them with little awareness. Instead, we can pause and reconnect with the larger purpose behind them: how it benefits us and others, and why it matters. Bringing our routines back into conscious awareness helps us rediscover their meaning and renew our commitment to them.

A Better Way to Begin Your Meetings

“One small step…” is the now famous quote from our first time on the moon. It can also be a great way to begin a meeting, especially when times are tense. Here is the quote that works for me: “Since our last meeting what have you noticed that’s been better or different.” Allow some silence and then take each person’s contribution. You can use “What was the small step that got us there?” Open a meeting with “How’s everyone doing?” and you will likely open a hornets’ nest of issues. But ‘better or different’ and recognizing ‘small steps’ of movement will likely put those at the meeting on the path to solutions or at least “We are on track…”

Me, Myself and I

Recently I was listening to a homily where the priest offered a simple truth: our everyday trinity often becomes me, myself, and I. That message made me think about how many times we center ourselves in a meeting or presentation instead of the people we're trying to help.

When we intentionally ground our work in shared values, both personal and organizational, we clarify what matters most for our audience and become more useful to others.

The video below explains how to get back to the trinity that actually serves our teams. What would change if your next message focused more on others and less on I, myself and me?

Before You "Post," Pause

“Think before you speak is an age-old, often‑repeated parental reminder; now it might be think twice before you write online—then don’t, especially if you feel the world really needs your opinion.

I often hear others say, ‘In my opinion…’ and I wonder if the world really needs that, especially when it comes to hot‑button issues. I saw a message online: ‘I probably shouldn’t say this but…’ Yes—correct—you might consider keeping that one to yourself. Or the ever‑famous, ‘I know I’ll get some blowback on this…’ or ‘This may be politically incorrect but…’ I’m not sure the world needs anything that ends with ‘but…’

I’d be interested in what all of you think about this. When do we actually need the personal opinions of others? Chime in below.”

Increasing Your Energy Before You Present

I recently gave a presentation on presentation skills, and there are two things I always come back to: executive presence and the ability to present to executives. Those two elements shape how people experience you long before they remember a single slide.

Most of us walk into a presentation thinking about our PowerPoint, how we look, or what we hope the audience will take away. All important. But there’s another layer that changes everything: your energy.

I use a simple practice that helps me show up with clarity and intention. Before I present, I write out what I want participants to walk away with. Then I write a short “testimonial” as if a participant were describing my session afterward. That exercise alone raises my energy and sharpens my focus.

You can use the same approach in your meetings, even when you’re not leading.
-What do I most want to say in this meeting.
-What would I want someone in the room, or even my boss, to say about my contribution.

Energy changes delivery. It changes presence. It changes how people hear you in a presentation, a team meeting, or even a family conversation. Try it and see what shifts for you.

Finding the Balance in What We Share

“In conversations, we all tend to lean one way or the other. Some of us share everything and overwhelm the other person. Others hold back so much that people have to pull information out of us.

In this video, I talk about what it looks like to land in the middle, to disclose just enough. If you want to communicate with more clarity and intention, this one’s worth a watch.

Choosing the Pace That Serves You

I’m making 2026 business travel arrangements and for as many as I can, I’m not rushing home in rush hour or worse on the red eye but rather taking that extra night with a mid-morning return. I’ll have a dinner or two with a nearby friend or past customer, take a walk, write my notes, maybe even be free to have dinner with my client. Yep, that’s what I’m going to do in 2026!

The Power of a Three-Minute Message

In high school, one of my teachers was a priest who founded the chapels at Midway and O’Hare. Despite being deeply spiritual, his homilies never lasted more than three minutes—he used a clicker with a timer and stuck to it.

It makes you wonder: how much clarity, focus, and impact could we create if we treated our updates, reports, or requests the same way?

Instead of talking at people, what if we shared the essentials… and then paused long enough for them to respond

?Watch the short video and see how a three‑minute mindset can change the way we communicate.

Metaphors and Stories

  • “Think of it as….”

  • “Sort of like…”

  • “It is as if….”

  • “I remember this one time when…”

  • “I once noticed…”

  • “One of my professors remarked that…”

In your meetings and presentation keep using metaphors and stories to keep the audience in alignment with you, to keep them interested, and to turn your expertise into useful information. One of my attorney clients said with some exasperation, “How many ways can I explain the term ‘negligence’?” To all of us non-lawyers it is worth the effort. Your audience will always be polite and nod in agreement but retain nothing! So, check at the end of any technical explanation with the simple and powerful, “I’m trying to get better at this. Please tell me in your own words what you think negligence is.” You will be amazed how clear you were…or maybe you’ll have some clearing up to do!


Advice From The King

A long-ago voice on radio and television, the preeminent interviewer Larry King, wrote: “Nothing I say today is going to teach me anything. So, if I am going to learn I must do it by listening.” Now the ironic part of this quote is that Larry was married eight times, twice to the same woman. So, this advice worked at work, maybe less at home? A quick check-up, how well do I listen at home and with friends like I listen to my KOL, my colleagues, and my boss? Remind myself: Everyone loves hearing a good listener!

Using Your Native Language

For this week's Wednesday Rewind, I talk about "Using Your Native Language" to connect with others. What strategies do you use to connect with colleagues, neighbors, friends or when meeting new people?

Teaching at Institute of Pastoral Studies - Loyola University Chicago gives me a worldwide view of life with students from Korea, Poland, China, Spain, South America, India, Pakistan, and even from Atlanta, Georgia! As I teach, I’ve learned to use their native language to teach me more about our English vocabulary. I recently asked the students to put the word “hunch” on the board in their native language and then to define it. None defined it as “hunch” instead painting a video for us of that word in action. I asked a student from Thailand to write “empathy” on the board in Thai…it was a very long word! When asked to define it, she thought for a moment and said, “Sitting on my grandmother’s lap after dinner before the fireplace.” Perfect! With your international colleagues or neighbors try using their language early and often to enhance your English understanding. The powerful world of words, images, metaphors, and inclusion awaits.

Is it Necessary

When we bought our first home, we did all the things first time home buyers do: We bought stuff! Lawn mower, rakes, shovels, air conditioner cover for winter (this was a few years ago!), and a new this and a new that. My next-door neighbor who was much older and wiser when he noticed or I told him of my newest purchase always said the same thing: “Is it, was it, necessary?” This became a kind of motto for me in those early years and saved us a bit of cash. Today I still ask that when I’m preparing for a presentation or a facilitation of a pharma team. How is this plan, this PowerPoint slide, this activity…how are they necessary? Our audiences the ones within our teams and companies or our KOLs are much, much more discriminating these days with the value we present. They are, as Nido Qubein, President of High Point University, the value interpreters. When we focus on us alone, we exclude the ones who will know the real value…the audience. Every one of them is asking, silently of course, “Can you help me solve my problem? Can you improve my condition?”  Consider next time to strip down that PowerPoint deck and make room for what is necessary and for the audience to tell you what is useful.

The Art of an Introduction

How do you think of others?  How do you introduce them? I notice that physicians are known and introduced by their name and their specialty and…that’s it! It is as if they are a “noun” defined by a name and a thing…their specialty. Of course, depending on the specialty this can come with a raft of judgments! Surgeon? We all know what they are like, right? Hospice? They are so nice! But what if we help this definition-by-noun/title with a metaphorical verb/adverb after their name and specialty. “Dr. Hicks is our neurosurgeon and also a Boston marathoner and she is certainly that too in the OR and at the bedside…she never gives up.  Dr. Ana McKee at The Joint Commission holds three C-Suite titles and was once introduced by those titles (her nouns) with the following, “And she has met seven Supreme Court Justices (her husband is a Federal Judge) and you’d never know it unless you ask by the way she treats everyone not as better or worse but as who we are together.” Doesn’t this round out her identity to you a bit better than only her influential status at The Joint Commission? Who do you know at your place…and how do you both think about them and introduce them? Enhance their presence and you will enhance yours as well.

First Step Might Be the Hardest

This week's Wednesday Rewind felt fitting after that nail-biting Game 7 over the weekend. Ever found yourself unsure how to jump into a meeting or discussion? What strategies help you navigate those moments?

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Meetings and discussions are prime opportunities to make ourselves heard, but often hesitancy, embarrassment, and simple ignorance prevent us from saying anything. 

I was recently with a group of men who were discussing a baseball game – their vast knowledge of the game was met with equal amounts of enthusiasm! My ‘sports chat’ however is limited to when I watch the Olympics every four years, and the odd demolition derby or two during the summer. I am quite literally clueless with nothing to contribute. Nothing! So, I sat in silence occasionally nodding my head to show some semblance of, well, anything. Everyone could have been speaking Romanian for all I knew! 

Being an extrovert, one can only do this for so long before breaking so I took a different approach. “You mentioned ______, the first baseman. In your opinion what makes him so special?” At that moment I was desperately hoping the guy was the first baseman! All of a sudden, an entirely new conversation began with me there too. The ‘guys’ all had an opinion… all I had to do was ask a few more questions out of real curiosity (and complete ignorance!) to be able to join in. 

My inner expertise is curiosity, not baseball. This same skill allows me to communicate with executives, the homeless, snobs, us commoners, even with those I don’t like a whole lot!  Phew, this time I made it out of a sports discussion with my self-esteem intact…and I even found out what a first baseman is supposed to do!

AI & Your Career Materials - A Powerful Tool, A Risky Shortcut

AI can save us time—but when it comes to career materials, speed isn’t everything.

In this short video, I explore how AI can support your writing—and where it can steer you off course.

Quick takeaways:

  • Your voice matters. AI shouldn’t erase it.

  • Generic resumes don’t connect. Tailored ones do.

  • Think about your audience—not just what you want to say.

AI is a tool. Let’s use it wisely.

Is My Evaluation about Being Mad or Hurt?

Are you ever asked to evaluate a presenter, a product, or a service? Some of us do so gladly with the effort to help. Some, however, decide that my bad day is going to be your bad day! Evalution's are often anonymous and in some cases, anything goes! What is your goal? Do you want to critique or help, provide support or solutions, dump or demonstrate? Give an evaluation honestly with the thought that this could make someone or some hotel better. I gave a terrible Press Gainey score about a physician visit and received a phone call within 12 hours from his office manager. “What can we do better next time Mr. O’Connor?” I should have included that the first time and not given a score out of anger but out of concern for the next time. (I would have been even more impressed had he called me back.) I once met Costco’s VP of Produce, who on a daily basis randomly chose three complaints and called the person for more feedback. He learned a great deal and won over another customer.

Lead with Wisdom, Not Just Data

Recently, a Maryland toddler fell from the 15th story of an apartment building and survived with a broken leg and some internal injuries. An MIT physicist and mechanical engineering professor, Anette Hosoi, said, “It’s not the fall, it’s the landing.” She then went on to speak about terminal velocity, mass acceleration, and other factors.

Her first quote though about the fall and the landing is the one that sticks. She said it first instead of all the data first. And in plain language that everyone can understand.

Later in a tip for parents in high rise apartments, Katie Donnelly, a pediatric emergency medicine physician at Children’s National Hospital in Washington, cautioned, “Screens keep bugs out, not keep kids in.” The details of why and how can come later; the wisdom is in the first sentence about screens.

An idea for us all, especially when presenting complicated material, is to find a way to make things very clear to any person at any level of education.

Dr. Rudolf Dreikurs cautioned us not to worry about being “perfect” but rather concern yourself with being “useful.”

Oh, and some interesting ideas here: Joshua Abzug, a pediatric orthopedist at the University of Maryland Medical Center, noted that the child landed in bushes with strong branches, which absorbed the energy. Had the child landed in a soft spot, the injuries could have been much worse, perhaps even fatal.

And one more tidbit: Hosoi mentioned that if a rabbit was dropped from an airplane (do not attempt this at home!), it has a 50/50 chance of survival based on its weight… as long as it isn’t a BIG rabbit!

The point to all of this: make your distinction short and clear and full of wisdom… then pile on the facts, if necessary!

Know when to walk away

One of the most powerful techniques I’ve learned from expert negotiators?
Know when to walk away.

When a deal is clearly misaligned, forcing it can do more harm than good. The ability to pause, decline, and reassess is a skill—and a sign of confidence, not weakness.

Every time I think of this, I’m reminded of the 1968 classic by The Four Tops: “Walk Away Renée.” Take a moment to enjoy the brilliance of this group: Watch here: https://lnkd.in/dzc5ahc4

Technology-free zones

Technology-free zones can transform your interactions! Watch this video to learn more...

I was heard

Thanks to parent educator Dr. Michael Popkin for this quote: “Democracy means you may not get your way, but you will get your say.”

If you lead a team, yes you can muffle them if you dare, cut them off, attempt to manipulate the agenda for speed…but you will always pay the price in their resentment, often silent and deadly, representing how disrespected they feel. A quiet team member is a dangerous one for you, for the effort, and for themselves.

This doesn't mean we vote on everything, nor does it mean that we all have to agree. It simply means your team members should leave any meeting with the phrase above all phrases in their heart: “I was heard.”