“If you can’t live with the fact that you are a predator, you shouldn’t be fishing.”
— Jimmy Carter
The first time I heard that, it felt a little uncomfortable. But it’s true. We do kill fish. Even when we "catch and release," the fish still leaves with a hook wound. And if it swallows the hook, there may be no release at all.
In To Catch a Fish, Mark Kurlansky suggests that the closer we feel to an animal, the more we care about it. We tend to care more about dogs than ants, baby lions than snakes.
Maybe someday we'll cuddle with octopuses instead of eating them once we fully appreciate how intelligent they are.
Here's another fishing lesson: if you're ever a fish and get hooked, don't swim away from the boat. Swim toward it. Your chances of survival are actually better.
That made me wonder: what if the same idea applies to human conflict? Our instinct is often to pull away. But sometimes the better move is to get closer. Dr. Dreikurs once recommended that married couples hold hands while arguing.
It's harder to focus on winning when you're physically connected to the person you're trying to understand. Martial arts teaches a similar lesson: get closer, not farther away.
Leadership may require the same courage. If you can't help someone move on from a role they're not doing well or aren't qualified for, you may not be able to lead effectively.
Sometimes growth, understanding, and leadership all begin with the same counterintuitive step: Move closer.
